Death to the Roundeyes!

Some people have all sorts of suggestions for "fixing" the WBC, but as I read article after article on the subject it all just comes across as "waaah the United States didn't win". Well boo-fucking-hoo. The fact of the matter is that there is no good time to hold the event if you want to maximize major leaguer participation. During March? I'm not on the bandwagon claiming that the WBC is ruining the sanctity of spring training or anything (whatever the hell that is... I thought spring training was about getting drunk and heckling Chris Shelton), but the American public is kinda-sorta distracted by other things during this month. Perhaps not the best time. Right after the end of the MLB season? If players are unwilling to participate in March because it cuts into their offseason then I fail to see how they are going to be falling all over each other rushing to play a basically meaningless tournament right after 162 games (or more if they made the playoffs) when they could instead be buying plane tickets to Hawaii or starting their post-season recovery. During the All Star break? I suppose that this suggestion, depending on how it synchs up with the other leagues around the globe, makes the most sense to me... but I thought the whole point was that you were expanding the MLB brand? Instead every 4 years you'd just be sacrificing one of the biggest MLB events of the year to try and force Americans to watch something that they have already resoundingly stated that they don't care about.

That, however, is the crux of the matter. So many people in America view the WBC the past few years as a failure when in reality it has been a huge, resounding success. The point of the WBC was to increase exposure of Major League Baseball around the globe. Sure looks like it is doing a bang-up job of that to me. Almost 55,000 showed up for the Japan-Korea final and ratings are up across the board. The point of the tournament is for it to be much more internationally-focused - why can't people just accept this? Waaah America doesn't win everything. Waaah. Puh-leez.

Sportswriters are the only ones who seem to really care about the WBC anyway. I don't see why they are trying to shove this down our throats. Is it moderately entertaining and did I watch a lot of the games? Sure. Do I give two shits that America didn't win? Nope. You'd think they would learn that the good 'ol US of A has a history being utterly indifferent when the media tries to force it to like sports events. How did that $250 million work out LA Galaxy? El-o-el.

Curt-ain Call (Zing!)

So Curt Schilling has retired today.

Actually yesterday. Unless you're on the West Coast, in which case it was still today. Or if you live in Guam. In which case it may have been two days ago. I say "may have been" because I tried to be clever and discover somewhere where it would be two days ago. But the calculations involved ended up being more complicated than I thought. I have grown weary of actually trying to figure this out and will say it was two days ago in Guam. If you feel like correcting me on this, be my guest.

Of course, he announced this on his blog, because where else would he do it? It's not like he could have called a press conference or something.

Given his unabashed publicity whoring over the years, I'm pretty surprised he didn't call a press conference. With fireworks. And tigers. And large-breasted women with loose morals.

Hooray for boobs!

ESPN posted an article. Somehow this article only mentions in passing what I will always remember him for - his victory over the Yankees in Game 7 of the 2001 World Series. Remember? The game when he pitched 7 1/3 innings on only 3 days rest? Randy Johnson closed the game by retiring the only 4 batters he faced after throwing 104 pitches the night before? Luis Gonzalez's walk-off single to beat a previously invincible Mariano Rivera and the three-time champs Yankees?

That game remains the single greatest game I have ever seen. In any sport.

No I don't include any Michigan games in this tally. If I did it might not make the top 10.

There was nothing about that game that wasn't awesome. It was a great pitching battle the whole time through.

In contrast to some other games in that series, where one team couldn't get an out.

Then Randy Johnson came out to pitch, and everybody said "Holy shit!" Then Mariano Rivera came out, and I almost turned the game off. He was untouchable that year. He's the only non-knuckleballer whom I've ever seen switch hitters hit off the same side as he throws. (Tony Fernandez was the hitter.) He had 50 saves that season. Mariano Rivera didn't blow saves. He didn't even give up hits.

I would like to know how many bats he broke that season versus how many hits he gave up. It seemed like almost every lefty he faced broke their bats that season.

I watched in disgust and prepared myself for watching the fucking Yankees win another fucking World Series. Then a ray of hope appeared. Rivera made a bad throw to second on a bunt. Then Brosius decided to hold on to a ball instead of making the throw for a double play. A hit by pitch and a bloop over a pulled-in infield ended it. Greatest. Game. Ever.

This post was done in the style of The Sound and the Fury. Except this post makes some sense. If you understood the reference, I feel sorry for you. If you didn't get the reference you never will because the book is impossible to read. Why would I do this? I felt like it, that's why.

Fuck You Zach

Ever under-fire Tigers pitcher Zach Miner was finally put out of his misery earlier today. Thank you Jeebus.

Props to Leyland for stringing Miner along though:

"But there is that one little percentage that if some other things don't work out, it could happen."

I think there is a "99.9 percent" chance Miner's reaction was exactly like this:

NCAA Hockey!

March is here, and that means everybody's favorite time of year is rapidly approaching. That's right it's time for the NCAA Hockey Tournament. I have been closely following college hockey all season, and by that I mean I just spent 15 minutes reading uscho.com this morning. This extensive research has brought me to some conclusions:

1. Apparently the NCAA Hockey Tournament has not started yet.
2. Michigan is currently set to be a #1 seed for the playoffs.
3. UNH was swept this weekend in the "Hockey East" tournament, giving me plenty of fodder with which to mock my classmates.
4. Apparently there is a school called Bemidji State, they have a hockey team, and they just won the CHA.

Before I break down the Hockey Tournament, I would like to point how great of a name Hockey East is. It's so simple. It involves hockey, and said hockey is played in the east. Somebody who has no knowledge of college hockey can instantly determine all they need to know about the conference just be reading the name. (This is in contrast to Atlantic Hockey, in which Air Force plays. For the geographically challenged, the Air Force Academy is located in Colorado, and Colorado is just about as far as you can get from the Atlantic Ocean. (Or perhaps they are just preparing for a post-apocalyptic America where the Atlantic Ocean extends to Colorado and all disputes are settled via college hockey.))

Computer-generated model of U.S. after global warming.

Now for my break-down the NCAA Hockey Tournament . . . Michigan will win. This is not just based on my own biases, but is the product of the aforementioned extensive research. First, Michigan's coach, Red Berenson, has quite possibly the manliest name in all of sports.

Pictured: Manliness

Second, Michigan has great forwards. Or defense. Maybe it's their power play. I don't actually know anything about hockey except that it's played on ice. If you actually read this whole thing expecting an actual breakdown of the NCAA hockey tournament, you need to reevaluate your life.

I don't know who this is, but he appears to play hockey for Michigan.

So there you have it, a complete and unbiased break-down (yes, I have spelled breakdown three different ways in this post) of NCAA Ice Hockey Championships. You're welcome.

Bondo, My Penis Both Feel Good

This year is absolutely critical for the Tigers organization. The team is coming off a year where they had the second highest payroll in the majors... and finished last in the AL Central. Jim Leyland is in the last year of his contract. Also, GM Dave Dombrowski made relatively few moves this offseason for a team that many thought needed to add quality pitching.

The offense is expected to still be above-average (barring another snail-like start to the year from Cabrera). The return of Binge to the starting lineup and the acquisition of Adam Everett (.213 BA last year? Solid.) shouldn't slow down Magglio, Miguel, Placido and Gramsterdam too much. Gerald Laird is mildly intriguing offensively as well. No, the success of this 2009 Tigers team hinges solely around the pitching.

Placido Polanco was on The Simpsons. True story.

Some of the news coming out of spring training has been good. Other news not so good (Verlander going 9.1 IP with 9 H 9BB 5 K 6 ER so far, for example). But the fact remains that this pitching staff needs to get its shit together. Verlander is supposed to be the ace of the staff - going 11-17 is completely unacceptable. Bondo needs to recapture some of that 2007 magic when he was 10-1 at the All Star break. Porcello needs to step up and prove he was worth the 2007 1st round status and the contract that was so huge it pissed off Selig. Zumaya needs to stop being a dumbass. Galarraga? Keep doing whatever the hell it is you're doing.

Will the pitching turn itself around? I honestly have no idea. This team is just too Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde for anyone to really know. But spring training is a fun time for baseball and is a time when everyone is hopeful and looking forward to the upcoming season, so it's fun to pretend that Verlander and Bondo will both win 20+ games and Big Z will grow into the closer everyone expected him to. It's also fun to pretend that I'm a knight slaying a dragon when I'm in my pillow fort. Rawr. Plus, spring training gives us stuff like this:

Detroit, You Suck at Drawing

The Detroit News recently had a contest to design a new logo for the Lions. The winning entry received one resounding "meh" from me... but since no one asked me my opinion (assholes!) I'll just make fun of the people who took the effort to send in entries. Aaah, the anonymity of the internet feels like a nice, warm, comforting blanket. So many of the entries were just plain fucking terrible though. I was going to add in more words to that last sentence so I could link to more pictures but, whatever, you folks get the point.

Half the time I was trying to figure out if the Detroit NFL team was the Bears or the Hedgehogs. Seriously people , how fucking hard is it to draw a muscular, wild killing machine (a lion, not Chris Benoit)? Like 90% of you don't even have jobs - practice a bit before you send your drawing of a prolapsed asshole that is (allegedly) supposed to be a lion.

I missed the deadline unfortunately, so it's too late for me to submit my drawing of Marinelli riding a giant penis. I'll go ahead and just post it here for your viewing pleasure though.


I couldn't get the scrotum to look quite right though. The testicles are too rounded. Wait. Everyone else has really blocky testicles and it's not just me... right? RIGHT?!?

I Expect to Cry Myself to Sleep on April 25th

With the Combine behind us and most of the important free agency deals signed (questions remain about currently under-contract players such as Boldin and Julius Peppers, however), the NFL offseason is marching towards its crescendo that is the NFL Draft on April 25th and 26th. Only the pro days, which begin in the upcoming week, remain. Now granted, the pro days will be extremely important for a number of players (Crabtree, Andre Smith, Malcolm Jenkins, etc.) but most of the work is done and all of the tape has been viewed multiple times.

The question that seems to be on everyon's mind is, "Who will the Lions take with the first overall pick?" Unfortunately, the answer appears to be Stafford. All signs seem to indicate that the Lions plan on drafting a QB. After Kitna was traded to the 'Boys (Jesus-loving Kitna should be an interesting addition to an awesomely screwed up locker room atmosphere) and Orlovsky was allowed to go to the Texans, the current Lions QB depth chart reads like a bad, bad joke: Daunte Culpepper, Drew Stanton, Drew Henson. Unless Schwartz is planning to throw Stanton into the thick of it next year or make a last-minute bid for one of the FA QBs still out there (Garcia, Leftwich or JP Losman), I sincerely boubt that Mayhew and Schwartz are planning on rolling with Culpepper as their starter.

Unfortunately, the relationship between Josh McDaniels and Cutler appears to be on the mend so the train has left the station as far as the Lions having a shot at Cutler. On a side note, the Broncos fanbase that is mostly lambasting Cutler needs to get a life. Cutler is easily a top-10 QB and one of the league's true rising talents. The good people of Denver were spoiled by having Elway for so many years. So what if Cutler was a little miffed at management for trying to trade him? I'd be mad too if a new coach was hired and less than a month into his tenure his first major act as HC was to try and dump me out of town.

This man is trying to beat out Lane Kiffin for the "HC Wrecks New Team In Shortest Amount of Time As Possible" Award

At least some Denver fans are reasonable.

The problem is that the Lions have such a dearth of talent at nearly every position that any single draft pick is unlikely to affect huge change by himself. The answer then? Build a solid framework based around the offensive and defensive lines. First of all, there are some excellent OT prospects this year - Jason Smith and Eugene Monroe arguably being the standouts - whereas the QB crop is regarded by many to be overrated, dangerously inconsistent or just plain inexperienced. Any QB they drafted would likely be killed due to the ineptitude of the epically terrible joke of an offensive line the Lions coaching staff would trot out anyway, unless the O-line gets some much needed help. But hey, that whole "throw the young QB to the wolves with no O-line" worked out really great for David Carr... right? Oh, woops.

It was disturbing when I was trying to come up with a list of strong points for the Lions - positions at which I deemed the Lions needed less/no help from the draft - that I was only able to come up with a few names. Obviously Calvin Johnson is the diamond in the rough that is the Lions. Ernie Sims has now put together 3 strong seasons at OLB and is unquestioningly our best player on defense. Kevin Smith showed a lot of heart last year, rushing for almost 1000 yards despite questionable decisions by the coaching staff to keep him out of the starting lineup and having one of the worst offensive lines in NFL history be his blockers. Along the way he cared only for the team and never complained when he was benched in favor of Rudi Johnson, despite performing relatively well. Cliff Avril is another player that has earned himself more playing time next year (5 sacks in limited action in 2008). Corey Redding may deserve to be on the list since he was been pretty solid throughout his career, but he may just not be big enough to act in the Haynesworth-type role that will be asked of him when Schwartz implements his 4-3 desensive scheme (Redding listed at 295 lbs / Haynesworth 320+) .

The secondary is also in shambles, but the DB group in this year's draft is relatively weak. Malcolm Jenkins especially had an extremely disappointing combine. With the acquisition of the fairly solid Anthony Henry (168 tackles, 9 ints and 39 PD from 2006-08) from Dallas and an adjustment in the overall defensive philosophy, I believe the secondary is not the best area to address with an early pick.

With all the help that this team needs, it seems obvious that the best pick to make the team as a whole better and more secure for the future is a dominant OT (J. Smith / Monroe) or, perhaps, Aaron Curry.

I know, I know... I just blathered on how the last thing the Lions need is to take a skill position player with the first pick, but Aaron Curry may be special enough to make an exception. All hinging on whether or not they could successfully switch him to MLB (with Sims playing weakside OLB). Aaron Curry is that Calvin Johnson-esque freak of an athlete that comes around so rarely. Considering Calvin qualifies as one of the few picks that Lions management has made that has actually worked out (in fact, worked out really, really well), then perhaps it is worth it to adopt the policy that the team is so unbelievably bad and needs so much help that the best course of action is to just take the best player available.

The FA pool the Lions could draw from the offseason was virtually nonexistent. Believe it or not, players don't want to go to an economically-ravaged city and play for a team coming off an 0-16 season. Weird, huh? To have any chance at improving in the upcoming years, the Lions need to have an extremely strong draft this year. Mayhew started his tenure off the right way by robbing the Cowboys. Now it's time to make another strong move and plan for the future by taking either Jason Smith, Eugene Monroe or Aaron Curry witht he first overall pick in the 2009 draft. My personal choice would be J. Smith, but I would be happy with any of them.

That said, I fully expect Stafford to be suiting up for the Lions next year and it makes me cry.

UPDATE:

Make this happen Mayhew. Make. It. Happen.

What To Watch For: Michigan Football Spring Practice

We miss you Jake.

With Michigan Football Spring Practice less than 2 weeks away (official start is March 14), its time to take a look at 5 key questions that surround the team this offseason.

1. Will Tate Forcier prove he is capable of starting from Day 1?

When the season ended and everyone looked to next season, all the talk focused on who would be the quarterback next season. OK let's not kid ourselves, the debate probably began around the second quarter of the Toledo game if not sooner. Would Tate Forcier come in and start from day one, would he split time with Steven Threet, or would Threet beat him out and remain the starter? Obviously all of these questions changed when Threet announced that he would transfer. However, amidst his transfer, rumors emerged that Threet was told by the coaches that Forcier would be getting a majority of the first team snaps in spring practice. Therefore Threet saw the writing on the wall that Rodriguez would be moving forward with his new recruits (Forcier and Denard Robinson). Whether or not this rumor is true is up for debate, but it seems clear that Rodriguez would likely have given Forcier a larger percentage of the snaps in spring practice. Early reports from 7 on 7 drills include stories of Forcier hitting unsuspecting receivers in the back of the head with his quick release and accuracy. Any completion was a welcome surprise last season as Threet and Nick Sheridan were barely able to loft the ball 5 yards on a swing pass, so it comes as no surprise that receivers weren't expecting the ball to be there as quickly as Forcier gets it to them. Forcier's familiarity with the spread offense in high school should serve him well and he understands the idea of Rodriguez's offense: Get the ball to the playmakers in the open field. He said as much in an interview on mgoblog:

I’m not going to try to do too much. I’m going to manage the team, rather than try to make the big play and taking a sack. The seniors and juniors make the plays, and I’ll just keep moving the chains.

All signs point toward him being the favorite to start and spring practice will show how quickly he can pick up the offense. And really with the Threet transfer, he should be the starter. It remains to be seen if he will be ready for Western Michigan on September 5.

2. Do leaders emerge on either side of the ball?

During the off-season last year, Rodriguez got rid of the Michigan tradition of naming captains before the season. Instead, he went with "game-day" captains and had the players vote on season captains at the end of the season. This was met with speculation that there would be a lack of true leaders among the team. There were numerous reports of rifts between last year's seniors, especially the defensive line, and the coaching staff which could have been the real reason for a lack of leadership. Either way, three of the four captains named at the end of the season were senior defensive linemen: Tim Jamison, Terrance Taylor, and Will Johnson. So the leaders that the players voted for were among those rumored to have issues with the coaching staff. Awesome leadership guys. The fourth captain? Mike Massey. Yes, that Mike Massey. Mike Massey whose 2008 season totals were: 0 rec, 0 yds, 0 TD. The same Mike Massey whose career totals were: 20 rec, 161 yds, 2 TD. At least he could block......nope couldn't do that either. Yes, the 2nd or 3rd string tight end was a captain. And we didn't see 3-9 coming?

Anyway, looking forward to next season, Brandon Minor and Brandon Graham should be the leaders on their respective sides of the ball. There really isn't much of a debate here as both guys came out after last season and specifically said that they plan on leading the team. Minor even says that he plans on making sure everyone on the team buys into RichRod's program (hinting that it didn't happen last season) in a video found on mgoblue (it's hard to directly link the video, click on the football tab to find the video). It doesn't hurt that Minor and Graham will to be the best players on the team next season. Look for them to have strong spring practices and expect them to be named captains at the end of next season. Some other players who could emerge in a leadership role are upperclassmen Greg Mathews, Donovan Warren, Steve Schilling, Jonas Mouton, Carlos Brown and yes, Zoltan Mesko.

3. Will this year's spring game be better than last year's?

Last year's spring game was by all accounts, an utter disaster. Played at Ann Arbor Saline, it was a cold, rainy day highlighted by.........not much. The public was not allowed, although the press was able to provide a sketch of what happened. Both Threet and Sheridan struggled mightily (but hey they were just learning right?), the offense looked terrible as Rodriguez was attempting to install his system (hey they were just learning right?), and the defense wasn't much better as it tried to learn Scott Shafer's system (hey they were just learn......ok you get it).

This season, the game returns to Michigan Stadium on April 11 and there is no reason to believe that it won't much cleaner as the players will have had a full year under Rodriguez. Their familiarity on offense should lead to better execution even with Forcier and Sheridan at quarterback. The defense might struggle a bit as they will be learning Greg Robinson's system, the third defensive system in as many years for some of the upperclassmen. All things considered, expect a much better game but if they struggle, hey they're just learning right?

4. Who emerges as a playmaker on offense?

Last year's team really lacked playmakers on offense and the problem with that is deeper than just the obvious "every team needs playmakers." Rodriguez's offense is based around playmakers. He wants to get the ball to fast, elusive little ninjas who make defenders miss in open space (see Slaton, Steve or Devine, Noel). He also needs a quarterback who is a threat to run. That doesn't mean the quarterback needs to run, he just needs to be a threat. By the end of last season, Threet was so afraid of running (and getting hurt) that defenses didn't even bother leaving a defender for him. Sheridan, well, he's Sheridan and no one really fears him. McGuffie made plays early in the season, but seemed to become more tentative as his injuries and concussions piled up. Minor is more of a bruiser who pounded the rock between the tackles. Martavious Odoms showed some promise at slot receiver, but completing a wide receiver screen was a minor miracle last season. Essentially this issue comes back to the quarterback getting the ball to the receiver.

These guys will be scoring a lot next season.

This spring, expect to hear the praise for how quickly Forcier gets the ball to the playmakers. He reportedly has the speed to be a threat to run and in all likelihood can throw a 5 yard slant over the middle or a swing pass. The playmakers Rodriguez is looking for will likely line up mostly at the slot but he will likely move them around and use some at running back as well. Minor will be the starter at tailback and has shown the ability to break tackles and make plays inside the tackles. Odoms figures to be one of the main guys at the slot but watch out for Terrence Robinson as well. Robinson was reportedly going to start over Odoms at slot before a knee injury caused him to redshirt last season. At 5'9" 170 lbs, he is the ideal Rodriguez ninja. Michael Shaw was bothered by a few injuries throughout his freshman campaign but showed some flashes of brilliance and will get time at both running back and slot this spring. Vincent Smith is an early enrollee who measures a diminutive 5'6" 159 lbs but rushed for over 2,000 yds as a senior in high school while scoring 29 TDs. He should benefit from the strength and conditioning program this off-season and will also get a look at running back and slot. The last guy is Carlos Brown. Brown has seemingly been injured for over 2 years but said that he was starting to feel close to 100% at the end of last season. It showed in his 115 yard performance in the Northwestern game filling in for Minor. He also filled in for Mike Hart against Illinois and Minnesota 2 years ago, gaining 113 and 132 yards respectively. He is faster than Minor and has the ability to make big plays. Look for him to have a strong spring at running back if he stays healthy (a fairly big if given his injury history).

5. What newcomers (redshirts/early enrollees) figure to contribute?

As mentioned in the playmakers section, Terrence Robinson is one of the redshirt freshmen who will contribute at slot and will have a chance to return punts. Quite a few offensive linemen redshirted last year and two names to look out for are Ricky Barnum and Rocko Khoury. Both have strong chances to compete for a starting job and should at the very least provide depth to a unit that severely lacked depth last year. Brandon Moore was a big recruit (4 stars, 6'6" 220) who will have bulked up during his redshirt year and will compete at tight end, a position that Rodriguez is looking to utilize more next season (rumors have RichRod picking the brains at Oklahoma and Florida to see how they use their TEs). J.B. Fitzgerald played in all 12 games on special teams, but started to see some defensive action in the last few games. He should be in the mix at linebacker. With Stevie Brown as only returner at safety, Brandon Smith will get a chance at safety and should at the very least seem some action. He figures be better than Brown at geometry (who isn't?) and therefore might know how to take an angle to make a tackle.

The two most obvious early enrollee contributors are Forcier and Will Campbell. Forcier is for basically the starter before even practicing with the team officially in pads. Campbell is a mass of humanity (6'5" 317 lbs) that will definitely get playing time at defensive tackle, arguably the thinnest position on the team in terms of depth. He has drawn rave reviews so far with his dedication to the strength and conditioning program from Mike Barwis (Barwis porn included here for the uninitiated) and Brandon Minor. Optimistic view is that he is a starter for the opener; pessimistic view is that he at least is in the rotation. Vincent Smith will get a shot at RB and maybe slot as mentioned above, as RichRod can never have too many ninjas. Anthony LaLota is another big guy (6'6" 260) who will get a chance at defensive end but only started playing football as a junior. He is raw, and would likely redshirt but will get a chance this spring (and summer) to prove he can contribute to a shorthanded defensive line. Brandin Hawthorne and Mike Jones (who? Mike Jones) will get a chance at linebacker and safety, both positions that need improvement over last season, but they might need a year to bulk up to contribute. The x-factor is Vlad Emilien, a 6'0" 190 lb safety from Ohio. He tore his ACL before his senior season but was still a highly recruited 4 star with offers from schools like Ohio State, Wisconsin, and Tennessee. If he is fully recovered from the injury, he could have a strong spring at a position that desperately needs improvement. Ideally, some other returners step up and Vlad gets to redshirt.


And finally, a more detailed look at each postion and some names to look for this spring and summer. Some of the new recruits have links to their highlight videos.

Offense

Quarterback:

Forcier and Sheridan will be competing but it shouldn't be much of a competition. Forcier will most likely establish himself as the starter. The real challenge might come from the ridiculously fast Denard Robinson this summer but Forcier will have a significant head start and Rodriguez's confidence before then. Enjoy this fake going away chat for Threet provided by Wolverine Liberation Army.

Running back:

Minor is the obvious starter. Carlos Brown returns as the primary backup. Kevin Grady (yes he is still alive) and Mike Cox (great name) will be the short yardage backs. Cox has a greatchance to get most of the short yardage carries given Grady's track record and his minimal playing time this past season. Michael Shaw might get some time here after playing sparingly as a freshman. Midget/ninja Vincent Smith might get a look this spring as a change of pace back. Recruit Fitzgerald Touissant (BEST NAME YET) will get a chance when he shows up this summer.

Fullback:

Mark Moundros is the returning starter and should be uncontested. RichRod likes to bring in fullbacks as walk-ons like he did with Owen Schmitt at WVU (Owen Schmitt beats self with helmet) and already has a few signed up.

Slot receiver:

Martavious Odoms returns as the starter but Terrence Robinson will definitely get plenty of action as mentioned earlier. Michael Shaw should get some time here in the spring as he primarily played RB this past season simply because the coaching staff didn't want him to have to learn multiple positions as a true freshman (he is officially listed as a WR on the roster). Roy Roundtree redshirted last season and will get a chance. Converted QB Justin Feagin will probably get a chance at slot as he didn't prove he could hack it at QB last year. Rodriguez can't get enough of these guys and signed two more this year. Army All-American Jeremy Gallon (provided he manages a 22 on his ACT; insert you get an 18 for your name joke here; fingers crossed) and Teric Jones are two more midgets who will get a shot this summer.

Outside receiver:

Greg Mathews and Darryl Stonum return but expect Junior Hemingway to figure prominently this spring. Hemingway played in the first 4 games but got mono and received a medical redshirt. He will ideally provide a deep threat on the outside that was lacking last season (along with the fact that the ball rarely got to the receivers downfield). Mathews is a Jason Avant-like receiver who has great hands and mediocre speed but has proven to be a good possession receiver. Stonum was a fairly well thought-of recruit who had a so-so freshman season. Look for at least one of these three to take a big step forward if they have a quarterback who can get them the ball. LaTerryal Savoy played some last year mostly due to Hemingway being out but the coaching staff reportedly likes him and he might be a factor. Je'Ron Stokes is another Army All-American who will compete this summer at both outside and slot receiver (at 6'1" he projects more as an outside guy but is fast enough to play either). Cameron Gordon is another recruit who will get a chance at receiver when he shows up but might eventually make a move to LB.

Tight end:

Kevin Koger and Brandon Moore will be the primary guys at tight end. Look for Rodriguez to attempt to get the position more involved in the offense as these two guys have a lot of talent.

Tackle:

Mark Ortmann and Steve Schilling return at left tackle and right tackle respectively and should lock up those spots with solid springs. Schilling is a stud, but Ortmann is a question mark. If he struggles, Perry Dorrestein also got a few starts last year and will be in the mix. Redshirt freshmen Patrick Omameh and Dann O'Neill might push for some time but likely still need another year and will at the very least provide much needed depth. The 2 freshmen recruits, Under Armour All-American Taylor Lewan and Michael Schofield should redshirt as offensive line recruits generally need a year or two plus the O-line has some depth built up from redshirting 6 guys last year. Lewan is one of those "huge upside" guys and already has the Jake Long comparisons surrounding him as mentioned in this interview:

Taylor's favorite player: former Michigan left tackle and current Miami Dolphin Jake Long. Dave told me that every Sunday, “Taylor watches the Dolphin games, and actually rewinds every offensive play to see what Jake was doing, and his technique.”

It's probably a fair comparison as Long was an upside guy who was rated about same as Lewan coming out of high school and has a very similar frame (Lewan is 6'6" 270). Lewan was actually a defensive player until his senior year and ended up as a top-5 player in Arizona after transferring and moving to tackle. Imagine how the coach at his first school that didn't see his potential as a tackle feels.

Guard:

Both guard spots were a bit of a mess last year. David Moosman started all 12 games at right guard and obviously will compete for that spot again. 3 guys started at left guard: Tim McAvoy, converted DT John Ferrara, and Mark Ortmann even switched over from tackle for a few games. Ferrara was switched from DT in the middle of summer practices and ended up starting at the end of the season. He'll compete with McAvoy who might also back up the tackle spots. Redshirt freshmen Ricky Barnum and Rocko Khoury will definitely be competing for the guard spots and have good chances to see major playing time. Quinton Washington is a very solid recruit who has the size to play right away but will probably redshirt due to depth.

Center:

David Molk started all 12 games as a redshirt freshman and was one of the few bright spots along the offensive line. Not much else to say other than Molk has a lock on the center position and look for some of the guards to back him up.


Defense

Defensive end:
Brandon Graham has a chance to be as good as LaMarr Woodley and although he isn't on the preseason Lombardi watchlist, he should be by the end of the season. He was by far the best player on the team last year and figures to have a very strong senior campaign. Expect Greg Robinson to utilize him in a couple of ways to free him up to make plays. The other defensive end is a bit of a question mark. Ryan Van Bergen has the most experience and will enter spring as the other starter. He was fairly mediocre last year and spring practice will be a good indicator if he is ready to step up. The other DEs with a little experience are Greg Banks and Adam Patterson and there isn't much to say about either. One of the three will need to solidify the other end spot. The 2 darkhorses are a pair of freshman recruits. Anthony LaLota as mentioned is a bit of a project but should benefit from enrolling early. If he can pick up some technique over the next 6 months, he has a shot at some playing time because he already has the size. Craig Roh was a teammate of Taylor Lewan, an Under Armour All-American and is another upside guy who is a bit light (6'4" 230) but has the technique. He was killing the top tackles at the Under Armour game with a deceptively good spin move and was able to track down dual-threat QB Russell Shepard (the #1 recruit in the country according some recruiting services) with relative ease. He should be able to be a legimate pass rushing threat as a true freshman. One or both freshmen could redshirt but the lack of depth at the position will probably cause at least one not to.

Defensive tackle:

As mentioned earlier, defensive tackle will be the thinnest position on the team in terms of depth. Both starters from last year need to be replaced but Mike Martin will solidly fill one of the two voids after a very good true freshman season. He was the first guy off the bench in the tackle rotation and has plenty of experience. Pencil in early enrollee Will Campbell at the other spot. As mentioned earlier, he has the size and the talent and just needs to get acclimated to the college game. The only other returner at DT is French Canadian Renaldo Sagesse who will compete for a spot almost by default. Greg Banks and Adam Patterson might slide inside from DE as well. Vince Helmuth moved from FB to DT during the season and is an unknown at this point. Greg Robinson plans on mixing his defensive fronts so sometimes there might only be one DT on the field half of the time.

Linebacker:

We now reach the positions of major woe last season. John Thompson is thankfully gone at strongside linebacker but its not his fault. He was born to play about 2 years ago when linebackers could be as slow as linemen. Jonas Mouton returns at weakside linebacker and showed major improvement toward the end of last season. He is someone who could emerge as a playmaker from the linebacker position. Obi Ezeh returns at middle linebacker and didn't show much improvement in his second year after an outstanding freshman year. If he can get a bit faster and improve his reads, he will be a factor. The linebackers are all grouped as one because most of them will likely play more than one LB spot. J.B. Fitzgerald has a good chance to be the strongside linebacker. Marell Evans and Kenny Demens will compete at strongside and middle respectively. Early enrollee Brandin Hawthorne will likely redshirt but might contribute on special teams. Robinson might use anywhere from 2-4 linebackers at a time depending on the scheme that week and the team they are playing. At the very least, it can't get much worse than what it was last year.

Cornerback:

Donovan Warren and Boubacar Cissoko will be the starters. Warren followed up an impressive freshman year with an underachieving sophmore season. Cissoko is a bit undersized but played well in nickel duty as a freshman. Many will rejoice the departure of Morgan Trent who finally exhausted what seemed like 8 years of eligibility. Again, there is no where to go but up at this position as well. J.T. Turner was the #1 player in Ohio and is basically the next Charles Woodson. He's 6'2" 185 lbs and proved he can cover anyone at the Army All-American game. He should be the 3rd corner and will get a lot of playing time. Can't really say enough about this guy, but he has the chance to be a special player. JT Floyd and Troy Woolfolk are 2 returners who will be in the mix for the nickel and dime packages. Lowly ranked Adrian Witty will come with high school teammate Denard Robinson this summer. Some considered him a package deal with Denard but Michigan seemed to want him regardless. Witty blew out his knee before his senior year and the experts didn't think much of him. He was supposedly as fast or faster than Denard before the injury. A definite redshirt, he will at least provide depth and could maybe turn into a player a few years from now.

Safety:

One of the worst performing positions on the team loses Charles Stewart (who we played against in high school and was not impressive then) and Brandon Harrison (who definitely failed geometry) but retains Stevie Brown. Everyone can rejoice! Or don't. But honestly Stevie Brown came out of last spring as one of those players who the coaches couldn't stop raving about. During the season, he was one of the players that the fans couldn't stop talking about........because he sucked. Every Michigan fan would be happy if this guy put it together his senior year and had a good season. He will definitely return as a starter, but the position should have better competition this season. Michael Williams and Brandon Smith will both compete for time at safety and both project as upgrades over the last few years of un-safety-ness. Four new recruits come in at safety: Vlad Emilien and Mike Jones who were discussed earlier, Isaiah Bell, and Thomas Gordon. Bell is someone who might develop into a linebacker along with Jones because of their larger frames. Bell was very highly though of by some recruiting services and not so much by others. The teammate of awesomely named Fitzgerald Toussaint, he was impressive at the Under Armour All-America Game and appears to also know geometry. He has a legitimate shot at some playing time as a freshman. Gordon was a high school QB, but is a good athlete who will need a few years. Emilien and Jones are probably redshirts as well but you can never count out special teams duty.


Special teams

Kicker:

Incoming freshman Brendan Gibbons should take over the kicking duties from KC Lopata. Bryan Wright might continue to kick off and will compete with Gibbons on field goals.

Punter:

Zoltan.

Kick returner:

Cissoko, Brown, Odoms, Shaw, and TRobinson will figure into the kick returns. Incoming freshmen Jones, Touissant, Gallon, and Smith will also be factors and will likely be an improvement on this.

Punt returner:

Odoms and Mathews were the 2 main returners last season with some disastrous results. Both will probably continue next year but TRobinson and Warren will also get a shot. The 4 freshmen ninjas will also get a chance.

Stephen A. Smith with Breaking News!

It's no secret that I am not a big fan of Stephen A. Smith. Comments don't become unique or insightful at a higher volume, despite what SAS may think. However, don't ever let it be said that the man is not fulfilling his media role to bring important and difficult-to-find information to the interested public.

"MY SOURCES TELL ME THAT BARRY BONDS MIGHT HAVE TAKEN STEROIDS!!"

According to Stephen A. Smith's "sources," Allen Iverson will come off of the bench on Tuesday night. Who are these mysterious sources, you may ask? Might it be...the coach of the Detroit Pistons and of Allen Iverson, Michael Curry?

"Curry announced earlier Friday that Hamilton would be back in the starting lineup and Iverson would move to the bench. Curry said he broke the news to Iverson on Thursday night, and the All-Star guard wasn't thrilled." (via freep.com)

Thank you, SAS, for this breaking news. You, sir, are a credit to the media.

Even God Hates the Red Sox

They closed the school today because there is a blizzard in New England. We are expected to get 8 to 12 inches. In March. "Scientists" explain the snow is a result of low pressure system from the mid-Atlantic states running into a stationary front. I don't understand a word of that sciency mumbo-jumbo, but it sounds like bullshit to me. I know the real reason for this frosty aberration: God hates the Boston Red Sox and is punishing all of New England for their allegiance to these douchey ne'er-do-wells.

Horns added, ridiculous facial expression in original