NCAA Hockey!

March is here, and that means everybody's favorite time of year is rapidly approaching. That's right it's time for the NCAA Hockey Tournament. I have been closely following college hockey all season, and by that I mean I just spent 15 minutes reading uscho.com this morning. This extensive research has brought me to some conclusions:

1. Apparently the NCAA Hockey Tournament has not started yet.
2. Michigan is currently set to be a #1 seed for the playoffs.
3. UNH was swept this weekend in the "Hockey East" tournament, giving me plenty of fodder with which to mock my classmates.
4. Apparently there is a school called Bemidji State, they have a hockey team, and they just won the CHA.

Before I break down the Hockey Tournament, I would like to point how great of a name Hockey East is. It's so simple. It involves hockey, and said hockey is played in the east. Somebody who has no knowledge of college hockey can instantly determine all they need to know about the conference just be reading the name. (This is in contrast to Atlantic Hockey, in which Air Force plays. For the geographically challenged, the Air Force Academy is located in Colorado, and Colorado is just about as far as you can get from the Atlantic Ocean. (Or perhaps they are just preparing for a post-apocalyptic America where the Atlantic Ocean extends to Colorado and all disputes are settled via college hockey.))

Computer-generated model of U.S. after global warming.

Now for my break-down the NCAA Hockey Tournament . . . Michigan will win. This is not just based on my own biases, but is the product of the aforementioned extensive research. First, Michigan's coach, Red Berenson, has quite possibly the manliest name in all of sports.

Pictured: Manliness

Second, Michigan has great forwards. Or defense. Maybe it's their power play. I don't actually know anything about hockey except that it's played on ice. If you actually read this whole thing expecting an actual breakdown of the NCAA hockey tournament, you need to reevaluate your life.

I don't know who this is, but he appears to play hockey for Michigan.

So there you have it, a complete and unbiased break-down (yes, I have spelled breakdown three different ways in this post) of NCAA Ice Hockey Championships. You're welcome.